Kiva is an organization that connects entrepreneurs in developing nations with people who want to "sponsor" them by giving them a "loan."  At Kiva people like you and me can choose specific people starting or gowing their small business to lend money to...and the result is helping them achieve economic independence.

Last year I made my first small microloan of a mere $25 to someone I found on Kiva.  I was excited to read of her progress in reports that she was being able to pay back her loan and recently she was able to make her last payment!  It's exciting to help someone help their business grow...to be able to give someone a hand up rather than just a handout.

When the full amount of her loan was repaid the $25 was sent back to me to either lend it out to another person who could use a loan, donate it to Kiva, or put back into my bank account.  I'd love to help out another person, so today I began looking for another person to lend to.

But to my surprise found that one of the requested loans was to help someone's cockfighting business.
http://www.kiva.org/app.php?page=businesses&action=about&id=36187
I understand that it is a common in Peru and other countries, but that does not make it right and I am saddened to see it being supported on Kiva. If the loan were for them to help get out of that business that would be great, but that does not seem to be the case.
Here is a short article about cockfighting http://www.downbound.com/Cockfighting_s/425.htm

I still support Kiva and all the good that it does.  I will still help make a microloan to someone through Kiva.  But I would hope that Kiva would reconsider supporting loans to businesses engaging in animal cruelty.

Since my one and only post on this blog on Zaadz I still have been letting go.  Finding different methods and ways to let go of the negativity, the past, the worries, the blame, the anger, the stories I tell myself, and more.

I thought I'd mention my favorite resources for letting go of the thoughts and beliefs that have weighed me down.

The Sedona Method by Hale Dwoskin.  There is a book by that title that you can get from amazon.com or order from your favorite bookstore.  There is also an "audio course with workbook" that you can get which costs a bit more, but some may wish to get it.  It's at www.sedona.com.  You can also just get the introductory cd and dvd that explains the basics of it for about $5 shipping and handling at that same website as well.

The Work by Byron Katie are four simple questions that can help you find freedom from thoughts that are causing suffering in your life.  You can find out a lot about "The Work" by going to www.thework.com.  There are videos showing the workk being done.  And there are worksheets available for download for free on the site as well.  There are books such as Loving What Is which explains The Work in more depth, and many other books as well that you can find mentioned on the site.

Those are now my top favorite ways of releasing.  But some other books I also like I'll list as well.

The Dark Side of the Light Chasers, by Debbie Ford
I have learned sooo much about myself and overcome so much because of this book.  It really opened up a whole new world for me.

 How to Get What You Want and Want What You Have by John Gray
There is a specific exercise in this book that I think is great.  You can find out how to do the first part here on his website http://www.marsvenus.com/tests/blockbuster.php  But to get full benefit I really recommend finding a copy of the book and doing the rest of the exercise too.


Ten Days To Self-Esteem by David Burns
This workbook can really help you to shift and release negative thinking.

Awaken the Giant Within by Anthony Robbins
This is the first book that really helped me discover how asking questions can alter my thinking and change my life around.

There are many, many more books and resources that I've found helpful.   But here you've gotten a small sampling that maybe you would find helpful yourself.

We reach the point where we become so tired of carrying our emotional baggage that we finally let it go.  It's no longer worth it...it never has been.  But that's almost beside the point, because we simply are literally unable to carry it any more.  We become too physically and emotionally exhausted to keep going on with the heavy weight of the baggage in our lives.  We may have made ourselves ill with our insistence on carrying it.  Or lost relationships where our baggage got in the way and kept them from getting close.  We may never have followed that dream because the journey allowed only carry on luggage and not a steamer trunk.  We've worn ourselves out trying to control the past that our baggage represents.  Anchoring ourselves to sorrow, anger, guilt, worry, blame, heartache and more.  Maybe we felt for so long that if we kept it close we could fix it, or protect ourselves from it, or something.  But at last, after jouneying for so long with it, finally it becomes too much, it finally slips from our grasp, falls to the ground with a resonant thud.  And often, we're so tired that a moment later we too drop to the ground.

But with our burdens droppped we begin to recover.  We begin to have energy again...maybe something we haven't had in years.  We feel relief.  We begin to feel a hint of what joy can be like.  We begin to move again.  Lighter than before, less effortlessly than before.  Free at last to be living as we were meant to be living.

We choose to carry our baggage, we can put it down at any time.  But if we choose to keep holding on eventually we will be forced to give it up.  Our emotions, our bodies, and our souls can't endure it forever.  Even for something as insubstantial as emotional baggage at last gravity, or the emotional and spiritual equivalent of it, takes over.  And we must let go.  And that is our blessing.  We are often left ravaged by our insistence of carrying if for so long.  But at least we are blessed to finally let go.

I can feel it slipping from my grasp...the handle of some emotional luggage I've been carrying for so long.  My arm aches and is weary, but I tighten my grip, convinced by fear that I shouldn't let go, although I couldn't even begin to name what is in it.  But I dropped one small suitcase of guilt back there some ways back.  A rucksack of blame tumbled off my shoulder not too long ago.  A mixed sack of judgement and self-pity caused me to trip again and again, so it became one of the first things to go.  A canteen of good intentions, but bracken with a hint of manipulation I chucked moments ago towards the setting sun.

I discovered the name of the road I am on is Aphiemi...Greek for "let go from oneself" and translated from an ancient book into modern language as the word "forgive."